“The wound is the place where the light gets in.”– Rumi, 13th Century poet and philosopher. Walking through the pain – feeling it, being with it, listening to it – can be our guide in getting through it and coming out the other side of it. Rumi may be telling us that walking through the pain we will find those parts of ourselves we never knew, a deep strength, a courage we need in our sorrow, a compassion for others in pain, a compassion for ourselves, a gift of feeling deeply. We may learn more about our own self. Walking through the pain, we will find a depth to life we never knew.

This is very much true. For being brokenhearted can bring you into that realization that you’re indeed is a human being — fragile and vulnerable; an earthen vessel that can crack and shatter, in one blow of the hand of life. And you have no other choice but to endure the pain and mend and heal your broken heart and spirit, until you are ready to face the world again.

“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding. Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain. And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life, your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy; And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always accepted the seasons that pass over your fields. And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief.”

As you undergo pain and suffering in this life, always remember that nothing in this world is permanent. Your pain is like rain clouds — after it poured it self out, it will vanish and the darkness will be gone. Pain and suffering are like mists. There will come a time that they will evaporate and become part of the wind that guides and assists your frail wings so that you can soar, up into the blue and wide sky during summer and spring.

Being with our pain, letting our wounds be, and not picking at them, will enable us to see them for what they are and heed the lessons they hold for us. This is not a talent, it is a skill anyone can learn, and one we can all practise. Cultivating joy is a practice, and it takes practice. It is possible to find ways to feel joy, even in your darkest moments, and there are various ways in which you can prepare yourself for them.

In other words, never, never, never give in! The brick walls in life are there for a reason. They are not there to keep you out. They are there to give you a chance to show how badly you want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it as badly as you do. They are there to stop the other people.

Let go

Change is never easy – you fight to hold on and you fight to let go. But letting go is always the healthiest path forward. It clears out toxic attachments and thoughts from the past. You’ve got to emotionally free yourself from the things that once meant a lot to you, so you can move beyond the past and the pain it brings you. Again, it takes hard work to let go and refocus your thoughts, but it’s worth every bit of effort you can muster.

Trust God 

God is always close to those who are hurt and in need of healing. It makes no difference to God whether His children are feeling the pain of a physical injury or suffering from an emotional wound. As Psalm 34 says, He is close to those who are suffering from broken hearts. He helps them to heal their bleeding spirits and restore their hearts. He does not leave anyone to suffer their pain alone. Instead, He stays near to help guide those who are hurting so that they can find healing. He restores broken hearts just as surely as He uplifts wounded spirits and straightened crippled limbs while He was on Earth.

Be Courageous 

When your heart is broken, it can be difficult to even consider being courageous, but courage is necessary to complete the healing process. It takes courage to stand up and move forward when your heart has been broken. It takes courage to leave behind your pain and sorrow. It takes courage beyond measure to dare to love again after suffering from heartbreak, but God gives us the strength to do all those things. He stands beside us and helps us move forward so that we can heal our hearts enough to be able to open them to others once more in an echo of God’s perfect love for us.

Healing begins when we examine what’s in pain, wonder how it occurred, and allow it to teach us. 

In fact, sometimes the brokenness is immense and the only grasp, the only power we have over that large and complicated pain looming over us is to bear witness, to tell its story, and to seek out companions and helpers who are willing to agree that yes, there is something breaking or messy in front of us, and we will not leave or even look away until repair has begun.